Monday, June 30, 2008

Men Tell Nothing Pre-Cap

Hey y'all...just chiming in on the Bachelorette for a minute. I wanted to pre-cap tonight's Men Tell Nothing episode and see how close I can get.

Here's how it will go: 20 minutes of recapping the recaps that we get at the beginning of every episode. $20 says there will be footage of DeAnna getting DeNied by Brad - truly priceless.

Then Chris Harrison, hopefully in some white jeans, will come out and pull each of the "significant" bachelors to the "hot seat" and ask them the important questions of the jilted bachelors:

The Chicago guy - how did it feel when DeAnna DeNied the chef, you thought you were safe on that date, then to all of America's surprise, you were sent home too.
- Yeah, I was surprised. I thought I was going to stay. But I didn't.

The Mullet guy - DeAnna said if she had a rose on your date, you would have gotten it, yet she sent you home that same episode!

"Yeah, what's your point?"

- I don't know, I felt a total connection with DeAnna, it came out of left field. I mean she just does not know what a good man looks like even if he's standing in front of her. I work out everyday on my elliptical machine and tan in my own tanning bed, because everyone knows you look thinner when tanned. Sometimes I even do 20 minutes in the sauna to get rid of the excess water weight, but I only do it in a swim suit that has a brand label.

Graham Cracker - DeAnna said you were the only one she was falling in love with, do you think she made a mistake in sending you home? Do you think DeAnna was asking you to go too fast? And what was in that letter?
- Ummm, I don't know. Where do I begin? I don't know what more to say.

"Did I mention I'm thinking of starting a children's charity?Visit"

Then DeAnna shows up to answer all the tough questions like:
- How was this experience different than when you were competing with 25 woman for Brad Womack who dumped your ass on television?
- Did you know you can become a fan of Graham Bunn on facebook?
- Would you still eat a graham cracker with your s'mores?
- Did you know you can become a fan of s'mores on facebook?
- Are you happy? Did you find love?

"Why wasn't I good enough for Brad?"

DeAnna: "I can definitely say that I found love."

I get 5 points for each of these.

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